Hello again!
Y’all, I gotta confess. I didn’t even realize until a couple of days ago that I sent my July newsletter with a JUNE heading (which kinda made sense because I was mostly recapping June…) So, now I have to send a 2nd July issue (smh… as the ‘youths’ would say). If you loved the first one—Christmas in July, you’re welcome, here’s another issue. If you’re already moving your cursor to the trash icon, you will be missed. At any rate, I am glad you are here. Thank you for letting me invade your inbox for a second time this month.
📌 In This Edition…
- Exclusive Book Reveal: As promised…
- The Grace of Grief: It takes time…
- Salacious or Inefficacious?: You be the judge…
- Book Talk: Remember those??
- Next Month: An A-frame studio update!
🖋 My XYZ Statement
I ain’t complaining because I got myself into this here situation—but lawdhammercy, writing a book is hard! I mean shooot, it sometimes takes me an entire day just to send one doggone email! Writers block is apparently not the same thing as sun block, because I’ve been fully lathered in that stuff for weeks and it hasn’t made the slightest impact in terms of generating momentum (though I am notably as pasty as one would imagine a summertime writer to be)!
All that to say, I was actually bluffing last month (ahem, I mean two weeks ago) and was hoping that announcing to my loyal followers that I would have a grand, never-before-seen, reveal for them in my next issue would actually kinda magically make me have something splendiferous to share. Sadly, this will not be the historic unveiling I was hoping to achieve (but shoot fire, I’m telling you, I’m close! Stay tuned for that big reveal…next month?!)
Here is what I can give you. It is my XYZ statement. This is the core purpose, hope, and direction for my book. It is a simple formula that forces you to analyze X: WHO your book is for (The People), Y: WHERE they are stuck (The Problem), and Z: WHAT transformation they can expect to glean from your story (The Promise). Dassit. It goes like this, “I help (X) overcome (Y) so they can (Z).” Sounds easy, right?!
It has taken me hours and hours of writing, weeks and weeks of reflecting, revising, contemplating, and editing. After chewing on my finalized XYZ statement for a month, I got coffee with a friend of mine from college (shout out, Huesón), and drove home from that realizing that I needed to scrap the whole thing and change my entire book (basically). So, hot off the press, my newly wrought XYZ 2.0 goes like this (still subject to change ha!):
I help young Christians work through the often hypocritical expressions of faith and the disconnect between belief and practice, so they may be strengthened to comprehend the love of Christ (Eph. 3:18) and surrender to His perfect will (Rom. 12:2).
NOW we are getting somewhere, folks! Next on my to-do list is to tackle the book outline!
🙏 The Grace of Grief
I read an article from The Dispatch that came out over the weekend about grief in light of national tragedies (like the July 4th flooding around Kerrville, Texas). [Side note: if you are not familiar with The Dispatch, follow the linked image below and consider joining a community of 600,000+ for as little as $0.27/day. It is high-quality, fact-driven, independent journalism—in contrast to the often scandalmongering outlets of the left and right. This news has kept me sane through a few calamitous presidential administrations.]
Here’s a quote from the article that really stood out to me.
Grieving in its fullest sense is a reforming of the imagination, a figuring out how to exist once certain ways of being have been made impossible… It is the work of letting suffering transform our moral imagination, making us more humble, more grateful, more generous people.
It seems like people generally do not allow themselves the time or space necessary to grieve. Maybe they feel like they don’t have the time? Maybe they don’t know how? Katie and I have had numerous people ask us, “So have you taken the time to grieve?” (in reference to our life change of adjusting to caregiving for a medically fragile child), and we have often felt at a loss for how to answer that. It’s not like you can just, set an egg timer and say to yourself, “Ok, now let’s take some time to grieve,” and start crying, is it? Grief doesn’t work like that.
As a generality, the pace of our Western lifestyle is too frenzied, too distracted. So when tragedy strikes, we want to lash out, argue with someone on Twitter, blame someone (“Thanks, Obama!”)—anything but feel our feelings or sit in the discomfort of unfathomable loss. It is ok to feel your feelings after a sudden tragedy—whether personal or national. It is ok to offer your presence to a friend or family member in the midst of their suffering without feeling the need to say anything. Don’t rush to fill the space of silence with simple platitudes (T’s and P’s, thoughts and prayers). Let the vital work of grieving run it’s course—let the suffering penetrate your imagination and transform you into a more humble, more grateful, and more generous person.
In Katie’s and my case, maybe we are watching TV, and there is a diaper commercial for “little movers”—and we recognize a sudden grief inside ourselves, that we will never see Izzie running around and diving on the couch like a Pampers toddler—or that as long as she is living, we will never be out of the “diaper phase.” It just hits you.Then you sit with it. You name it. You feel it. You examine it. You hold one another and grieve it—then you move on as best as you can, until the next thing triggers it all over again.
At my Mamaw’s funeral last year, someone shared that grieving is a bit like cleaning up glitter. No matter what you do, you never quite get it all. (This is precisely why I have had a life-long fear slash disdain for the stuff—and why some call it, “the herpes of craft supplies,” true story). Maybe you think it’s gone or plenty of time has passed so you’re all good, but every now and then, you catch a new speck glinting off the light. Our counselor pointed out that grieving isn’t linear—(I am sad, I grieved, now I’m good)—it is cyclical, it comes in waves. If you become cognizant of grief lurking on the outskirts of your awareness, please do not push it away. Learn to make space for it at your table.
Katie and I have recently been reading through John 11, the story of Lazarus. This story is so deep and we could take it line by line and have enough to talk about for years—but what we see is Jesus as a man—as a friend. He was deeply moved. He was grieving. He was indignant. He wept.
Then we see a dead body obey the voice of the Son of Man. It is so striking to me in light of this conversation—Jesus knew what he was about to do, and he still took the time to grieve with his friends. In fact, he walked for several days just to be with them.
Have you allowed your heart the silence it needs to keep company with your sorrow? What are you feeling that you aren’t taking the time to acknowledge? Make space for your grief. Let it be known, it is yearning to transform you if you would slow down enough to let it.
🌶 Salacious or Inefficacious?
I have to start this next section with a disclaimer: Katie would like me to make it known that she does not support the inclusion of this bit in this newsletter. She wants no part of it. Mainly because she is no fun. (Just kidding). So, I soldier forth without her blessing—and apologize if there are any undefiled gentlewomen reading this newsletter and feeling uncomfortable with its…shall we say—libertine content. Ok. Here we go.
Back in June, I had the privilege of being in the wedding of a great friend of mine from our Memphis days. The wedding was in Augusta, South Carolina (not Augusta, MAINE like where one of the guests flew to on accident…😬). And privilege of privileges—Katie was able to come too! This was our first trip kid-free since Izzie was born. Prior to that, we had ONE night kid free for our 5 year anniversary five years ago. My oldest is turning 8 next week, and we have clocked in an impressive 3 total nights without children (out of their 2,920 nights accumulated so far to choose from…) So, not great, but it’s a start!
Well, as you may know, one of the ancient and sacred duties of the groomsmen is to decorate slash sabotage the getaway vehicle. True to form for your very basic groomsmen, that noble tradition involved way too much advanced planning and forethought. Honestly, we were all feeling pretty chuffed that we managed to show up on time wearing the correct pair of pants—anything beyond that was starting to ask a bit much. Luckily for us, one of the lovely ladies in the bridal party had anticipated our likely incompetence and came prepared with some choice weapons of mass decoration (glitter, thankfully, excluded). We inflated balloons. We flung streamers with chaotic enthusiasm. Rainbow tinsel cascaded off the back bumper like a flowy disco waterfall. It was all pretty standard stuff, to tell you the truth. Someone passed out window markers and folks stuck to the usual themes, adding hearts and “Just Married” in ornate cursive. All good things, all good things.
But then I started to feel a bit…troubled—a bit uneasy. Like, this is feeling a bit too soft. Ya know? I mean, come on… we weren’t decorating a kindergarten classroom! This was THE wedding night that the newlyweds were about to head off to! We had to go bolder than tinsel…right?! This was a matter of honor. A sacred oath. WE, were the groomsmen! Someone had to do it… and I knew that if I didn’t do it, it wouldn’t have happened and we would have let down all of the groomsmen—generations of groomsmen!
I should mention, that this is a very Godly couple. So, I thought—perfect, I will give them the steamiest Bible quote I can think of. You can’t be mad if The BIBLE is on your car window, can you?! That wouldn’t even be Christian! Having extensive biblical knowledge myself, I had the exact quote come to mind that I needed in that moment (some may even say it was a movement of the Holy Spirit—a divine inspiration). So I confidently wrote the words of the Song of Solomon, chapter 4 verse 16, “Blow On My Garden” in large, bold capital letters across a window. I honestly felt like Leonardo da Vinci putting the first dauntless strokes on the canvas of the Mona Lisa. It was a piece of inspired work. It was sensational.
[Parenthetically, I should also include that I then drew two very small, rudimentary phallic forms as well. Again, someone had to do it and it felt like the right thing to do—that is, until the grandmas walked out for the send-off…😬 then it felt like it was a little over the top… But as my Papaw used to say, “If they haven’t seen one, they won’t know what it is—and if they HAVE seen one, they won’t be much surprised.] Such is the life of reckless abandon of the artist and his call—this is my cross to bear. I didn’t choose this life—but I had a sworn duty to uphold!
The groom texted the guys the very next morning saying how they had gotten a kick out of the car art. He also later confirmed that they had a great honeymoon, and that “the garden was blown.” I mean, that sounds like success to me! ‘Nough said! And you’re welcome! Groomsman duty: CHECK!
I would love to hear from you, dear friends. What are some memorable send-off vehicle decorations that you have seen or been a part of? Have you ever seen the Song of Solomon applied to this tradition before?
📚 Book Talk
Remember giving book talks in school?? What’s funny is—you could hardly get me to read a book in school, let alone talk about one. I remember seeing a bookmark in a library once that said, Some of my best friends are books and I thought to myself, “Wow. You need some new friends…”
James by Percival Everett
This is one of the greatest American works of all time. It is a scintillating historical fiction novel that tells the story of Huck Finn but from the perspective of the slave, Jim. Filled with sharp wit and emotional acuity, this fulgent and raw book is unyielding. Through nuanced humor and piercing insight, the story radically reimagines Jim—giving him voice and dignity—revealing his humanity, the depth of his intelligence, and his profound compassion—with breathtaking tenderness. This is a fresh and powerful retelling that will leave you in awe long after you finish.
All the Colors of the Dark by Chris Whitaker
This is a murky, turbulent thriller that is definitely on the darker side. It plays out over several decades—a mystery of missing girls, a cross-country search, the shadow of a serial killer. It is suspense in its truest form. But it’s also more than that. It’s a story pulsing with art and imagination, with the magnetic pull of love that binds one soul to another. It’s a tale of triumph and tragedy, of secrets and obsessions. It dances between law and lawlessness—and at its heart is an unlikely hero: the pirate kid. (This book reminded me of Season One of True Detective).
The Storyteller by Dave Grohl
I listened to this as an audiobook because Dave Grohl himself narrates it. It is the story of his illustrious music career—dropping out of high school, lying about his age in his audition, drumming for Scream and Nirvana, starting the Foo Fighters—his relationship with Kurt Cobain and the impact of that sudden and extreme loss. It is an ol’ rockstar sharing his life and lessons with the world (and maybe helped scratch an itch I’ve had since I was a kid of wanting to “be in a band”).
1984 by George Orwell
I am a little late to the party (pun purely unintentional here) on this one (seeing as it is a dystopian classic which was first published in 1949)—but I somehow managed to avoid reading it through all my years of education. Not to get political here, but this one is a bit chilling to read against the geopolitical backdrop of 2025—particularly as it pertains to the role of truth—and even the narrative of war—within societies, often controlling, manipulating, or exploiting information for a particular outcome—namely, power. All in total deference to the Party, of course. Big Brother is watching you!
The Cuckoo’s Calling by Robert Galbraith
I couldn’t make it very far into my newsletters without shouting out the GOAT of storytelling herself, J.K. Rowling, who writes her crime fiction detective series under the above pen name. This is book one in the series about a disabled war veteran turned private investigator, Cormoran Strike, and his partner, Robin Ellacot. It is hair-raising. It is magnificent. Honestly, I was depressed for weeks after I finished book seven (there are three more books planned that have not been published yet). I was depressed because I knew nothing else written would ever satisfy me ever again. Just look up depression GIFs and you’ll get the idea of where I was at post completion of the series…
Try Softer by Aundi Kolber
Honestly, more people need this message now more than ever. Most of our culture has internalized a “try-harder” belief—we keep going, keep striving, keep getting up early and working til late—and pretending we’re all fine—everything’s fine. “I’ll sleep when I’m dead” is the American gospel, not the gospel of Jesus. This unhealthy pace leaves us overexhausted, overwhelmed, and overburdened (all while we over eat, over spend, and over do it all). We are left completely drained and numb. Aundi’s wise words in this gentle book call us to something greater—to the stillness that God designed for our souls. If you feel like you are white-knuckling your way through life and barely holding it all together, do yourself a favor and Try Softer.
**IF YOU REPLIED TO MY LAST EMAIL** I never received it. A lovely reader made me aware of that unfortunate flaw (Hey, we are, afterall, building the plane while we are flying slash crashing, thanks for being here!) I have since changed a setting and you *should* be able to reply now and it will go directly to my inbox. (At least we’re about to find out!)
So, I would love to hear from you about last month (slash this month’s) question: What are some books you’ve been loving lately? AND a follow-up question: What is a book that has changed your life? (if you give me the Sunday School answer: The Bible, I will indeed throw my shoe at you).
🔭 Looking Ahead
In the coming months, I’ll be sharing:
- Book (and A-frame studio) project updates
- Honest thoughts and reflections on the creative and caregiving journey
- Things I am learning
- Maybe some general life hacks
- And hopefully, a few salacious stories to keep things interesting around here! (Sorry, dear!)
Thanks for being here. Thanks for walking with me. We’re on a journey—together.
Gratefully,
David
P.S.
If you missed the first newsletter, you can read it here
P.P.S.
If you enjoyed this newsletter, would you forward it to a friend who might like it too? If they subscribe and reach out and say that you referred them, I might even send you each a $5 Starbucks gift card… 👀 (depending on how many of you take advantage of this amazing, once-in-a-lifetime offer). Look how easy it is! I even added a Subscribe field just for your convenience! Literally just take my coffee money!
I’d love to keep growing this community. We are all running the race together. I hope you feel seen (or at the very least got a wee giggle out of my sophomoric ramblings).
DAVID SCOT MUSSER 